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"All the evidence suggests that it is how you manage change that matters, not the fact that you experience such a change in your life."
What is Sex Addiction?
Sex Addiction is thought to affect between 6% and 20% of the UK population. Sex addiction occurs when sexual behaviour is preoccupying and out of control. The sexual acting out behaviour is pursued in spite of devastating and harmful consequences where work, relationships, health, finances, social lifestyles and integrity are seriously compromised.
Sexual behaviours that can become addictive are masturbation, pornography, internet chat rooms, use of webcams, social networking sites, sex texting, phone sex, visiting prostitutes or escorts, multiple affairs, sex with strangers, pursing a fetish or even sexually offending behaviour. The emotional consequences with feelings of isolation, guilt and shame can often re-ignite the addiction and send the addict spiralling back into the behaviours as a way to cope. Shame if often one of the most difficult emotions to manage, with shame being thought of to sex addiction like oxygen is to a fire.
I tried other counsellors to overcome my sex addiction only to find I relapsed. On the verge of giving up that I would ever recover and the possibility of the collapse of my relationship and loss of my children, I discovered Karen and decided to give counselling one last try. I am really glad I did.
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Many people with sexually addictive behaviour are desperate to stop, try to stop but find they cannot stop. This is partly because of the mood-alternating experience of the sexual activity where a powerful cocktail of chemicals are released by the body. These chemicals from within the body can 'hijack' the mind bringing about a sense of euphoria similar to 'the hit' of other addictive chemicals taken from outside the body such as alcohol and illegal drugs.
The function of sex addiction is to anaesthetise painful feelings which cannot otherwise be coped with. Sex addiction is therefore a copping mechanism for boredom, depression, profound loneliness, sadness, anger, stress and pressure fear and anxiety and feeling empty or dead inside.
It is not unusual for those affected by sex addiction to have other addictive problems such as alcohol, drugs, gambling, food, money and work. Effective treatment can assess and address how these addictions interact with each other.
In therapy in treating sex addiction an assessment is made. Following that, treatment is mapped out to both understand the behaviours and offer ways to change them. Some of the goals for treatment are to help clients to stop, gain insight into why the behaviours happen, restore integrity and develop a healthy relationship with sex.
If you are unsure whether you have a sex addiction you can click on Am I a Sex Addict? and answer the following questions.