Series 3
The terms addiction and compulsion is often a subject for debate in PPU. Some say pornography is not addictive, some say it is. When people present with pornography use that feels “out of control,” and that involves harmful dependencies, they often ask a very understandable question: Is this an addiction, a compulsion, or something else entirely?
In making an assessment about PPU, I use the definition from:-
The World Health Organisation ‘s authors of the International Classification of Diseases, 11th Revision (ICD-11) announcing the classification of Compulsive Sexual Behaviour Disorder (CSBD) as a mental illness. The components of this are listed below.
- Being pre-occupied and out of control with persistent repetitive sexual behaviour.
- Continuing with the sexual behaviours despite harmful consequences, i.e., neglecting your health, personal care or other interests, activities and responsibilities and causes a significant impairment in personal, family, social, educational, occupational or other important areas of function.
- Numerous attempts to reduce or stop the sexual behaviour despite adverse consequences or deriving little or no sexual satisfaction from it.
- The pattern of behaviour to control intense, sexual impulses or urges resulting in repetitive sexual behaviour is manifested over a period of time – 6 months or more.
Distress that is entirely related to moral judgements and disapproval about sexual impulses, urges, or behaviours is not sufficient to meet this requirement.
Whilst this definition seems to suggest CSBD is an impulse control disorder rather than an addiction, I offer services for people struggling with problematic pornography use, pornography addiction, sex addiction and compulsive sexual behaviours. However, I do agree that these behaviours can be on a spectrum and follow the training and guidance of The Association for the Treatment of Sex Addiction and Compulsivity (ATSAC: www.atsac.co.uk). I offer a flexible approach viewing to make pornography addiction/compulsion approaches more integrative and avoid pathologizing or judging people with diverse sexualities.
Ultimately my goal is not to label you; you may describe or find you own words for how you are. My aim is to understand your experience so you can regain a sense of control and peace.
When Pornography Use Feels Like an Addiction
Some people describe their pornography use as being driven by a powerful desire or craving. The behaviour feels exciting at first—something that brings pleasure, intensity, or escape. Over time, though, they need more time, more variety, or more extreme content to feel the same level of stimulation. This can create a cycle where the brain becomes wired to seek those intense experiences again and again.
If your experience aligns with this, you might notice:
- A strong rush or anticipation before using
- Spending more time than intended
- Failed attempts to cut back
- Using porn to feel better when stressed or lonely
- Continuing use even when it has negative consequences
In this model, the behaviour is being reinforced by pleasure—your brain learns, “This feels good; let’s do it again.” If this fits your pattern, we may focus in therapy on strategies used for addiction-like behaviours: managing triggers, interrupting automatic patterns, building healthier habits, and strengthening motivation for change.
When Pornography Use Feels Like a Compulsion
Other people describe something very different. They don’t feel particularly excited by pornography. Instead, they feel pushed toward it by stress, anxiety, shame, boredom, or emotional discomfort. The use is less about seeking pleasure and more about trying to quiet an uncomfortable feeling.
Signs your pattern might be more compulsive include:
- Feeling driven to use porn even when you don’t want to
- Using it primarily to numb or escape difficult emotions
- Minimal enjoyment during or after use
- Immediate guilt or regret
- Feeling like the behaviour happens almost automatically
In this model, pornography works like a temporary relief valve—you feel a little better for a short time, but it doesn’t improve the underlying issue. In therapy, we may focus on emotional regulation, stress coping skills, mindfulness, and breaking the cycle of using porn as a way to soothe discomfort.
When It’s Both: The Most Common Scenario
Most people don’t fall neatly into one category. Many start with pleasure-driven use (addiction-like) and then move into emotionally driven use (compulsive). Others begin using porn to cope with stress and gradually get caught up in chasing more intense stimulation.
What matters is not the label, but understanding the underlying patterns:
- Do you use porn to feel good?
- Do you use porn to stop feeling bad?
- Do you use porn out of habit without thinking?
- Do you feel stuck in a cycle of shame that actually fuels more use?
Therapy often works best when it addresses several parts at once—your emotional world, your habits, your thought patterns, your relationship dynamics, and your coping strategies.
Moving Toward Change
No matter which pattern fits you best, there are effective tools you can learn:
- Identify triggers and emotional patterns
- Build healthier habits and coping strategies
- Develop awareness of urges without acting on them
- Strengthen intimate or relational connections
- Create a lifestyle that supports your values and goals
Recovery is not about perfection. It’s about gradually building a healthier relationship with your sexuality, your emotions, and yourself.
Final Thoughts
Whether your pornography use feels like an addiction, a compulsion, or a combination, the important thing is this: change is possible. You’re not alone, you’re not “broken,” and your experience makes sense given your history, stressors, and emotional needs. In therapy, we’ll work together to understand your unique patterns and build a path toward greater control, confidence, and well-being.
